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Shipping & Returns

Abney Parks Return and Exchange Policy

If your product doesn't arrive:

We can re-ship it once, but we can not refund your money. Its important you get your your address correct.

If you want a refund for a product you received:

Ship it back to us, and we can refund the value of the item. We will not reimburse you for shipping.

ship to:
Abney Park
4017 60th st. CRT NW
gig harbor, WA, 98335


Q: I bought Vault Access 5 seconds ago, and I don't instantly have my password! WTF!?

A: Okay, so the vault of the Ophelia was not made by Apple, Microsoft, or even Wallmart. It was actually made by a bunch of down on their luck track layers in 1903, under the instruction of Dr. Leguminous Calgori, but I digress.

My point is when you buy vault access, a little machine in the vault of the Ophelia rights a note, and sticks the note in a capsule, and sticks the capsule in a tube. The tube is pressurized on one side, and this causes the capsule to shoot through the tube, go up three floors, and spit out into a basket next to my bed in the captains quarters.

If I happen to be in my bunk at that time, I send you your password. Other wise, you wait.

Sorry, but look on the bright side, we ainít Wallmart!


Q: Do i have to use PayPal?

A: Nope!

PayPal asks you to log in, click the link on the lower right that says: "Don't have a PayPal account? Use your credit card or bank account (where available). Continue"

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